they don't leave.. they love..

"Why do the people we value the most sooner or later leave us? Easy, because our hearts can’t accommodate loads of people at the same time. =)"- realization of Kristine Liu

If there is one fear common to us men that would no less than be, the fear of being left alone. No man is an island as we frequently hear, still most of us find it hard to acknowledge the fact that even though we love and value our loved ones to the utmost effort we can. In the long run, there would only be two options for us to be prepared for; some of them would be kind enough to stay for us to endure a longer relationship, while others would be not-so-nice to cut their connections with us at the moment we needed them most.

We being humans, having a heart can be compared to a room with regard to welcoming persons in our lives. There are rooms which are big enough to accommodate a huge number of persons, but also there are rooms which are small enough to hold few persons. Yet no matter what, every room just like every heart surely holds on to persons who make up our whole being. Only it differs in capacity to lodge people. This variation in quantity is dependent on the size of the room, in terms of our hearts this discrepancy is caused by a persons’ ability or inability to open up himself for people around him to come into his life and occupy a space in his heart.

Lucky are those who’re blessed with the potential to get along well with others, while inauspicious are those who never even dared to share their lives with others for reasons alone they prefer to conceal.

Some say that they desire to be alone for them to be able to shun the pain they would in time feel after they are left by the persons they value, whereas others consider this option due to an after effect of being left alone.

Whatever reasons each of us may hold in ourselves, one thing is certain; staying away from this kind of experience is like having to keep yourself left incomplete. And this deficiency could only be completed by means of others’ participation in loving us wholly despite our imperfections.

And this acceptance of our imperfections sometimes reaches a point of abuse, thus causes our loved ones to leave us. Nevertheless we should bear in mind that they only leave us for us to be able to make room for others to be able to partake in our book of life. Yet with this we shouldn’t overlook the reality that even though they’re presence can’t be felt, the footprints that they left would always remind us that; they came and once touched our hearts.

**With the end, I learned..
I don’t desire to sound exaggerating but I really am sad as regards the ending of our PE classes. Perhaps it is caused by the surprising fact that I was able to take pleasure in the games we used to have.

Looking back in my high school times, if there’s one thing that could spell me out during the PE days, that would no less than be a huge L--- for loser!

Yep, I was a certified loser when it comes to batting. I can still recall a time when I failed in one of our practical exams because I wasn’t able to hit the ball in even though our teacher already replaced it with something much bigger than what is usually used. I think it’s of the same size of a child’s toy basketball. hahaha!:) I even batted for more than the whole practical period which annoyed my classmates and I still wasn’t able to hit the ball, not even once. That’s how poor I am. As a result, I started to abhor softball and consider it as a men’s game only. And I never even dared to share to anyone the reason why I wasn’t able to hit any kind of ball thrown at me, cause I fear it! weird huh?!

But now, pompously I have the competence to share to my high school friends that the ‘batting loser girl’ Mau they used to know was just a mere part of my past.. cause now I can make the ball fly on the first hit. ;p

Actually enrolling in that PE wasn’t my plan, it’s just that my friends enrolled for that one, out of fear of being left out alone and out of sheer desperation. At this instant I can pronounce that I’m more than glad and thankful that I enrolled in that PE class cause I was able to conquer and face my fear and eventually improve on it.hihihi!:)

**You get pissed by brash people..
I was shocked when Sir Baccay became infuriated as he was bout to lead the prayer before he leaves our class.

He demanded to my classmate seated in front of him to transfer her seat next meeting because she was pissing him off. Whoah! That word not even once crossed my mind to be uttered by the quiet Sir Baccay, but unpredictably he did!

Seeing our reactions one could instantly feel the shock which all of us are trying to conceal, to avoid humiliating my classmate who’s rebuked.

I hope he won’t be that irritable next meeting.. cause he scares me! Really!

**Out of the stream of mainstream..
Hahaha! I would have a deeper reflection about this matter on my preceding entries but for now I’d use it as a subtitle ok!

During our theo class Sir Agui mentioned about the7% tuition ‘fee’ increase for the upcoming academic school year. And upon hearing this common mistake some of us reacted..

“Sir hindi po tuition fee, tuition lang po! Kasi redundant na po ung tuition ‘fee’ pwede pa yung college tuition!”

Thanks to Sir Esgui,,hehehe!:)

And guess what he said, “Sus parehas din yun, yun na yung lagging ginagamit eh!”

Toink! I wanted to tell him.. “How about being open to some ‘correct’ changes sir?!”

I even cracked a joke to dez which says, “we can initiate in changing the world by correcting Sir Agui’s notion of the redundant tuition ‘fee’” followed by a faint laugh!

Hmm,, actually I mean that statement of mine.. seriously,, I really do! Cause how do you begin change when we’re so afraid to draw away from the stream of mainstream knowledge? Everyday you hear picketing workers asking for a change, but if only they would at least try to dig deeper within themselves.. change doesn’t always come from the outside and big things.. rather it starts from the inside and the small things!

**Not approved..that’s sad!
Bio class then followed the theo class, and I still not over that mainstream thingy became more displeased by that dim-witted fire drill! No I wasn’t pissed by the drill itself,, I was pissed because our building never passed the test..

And it was all because of one of this dumb section who refused to participate in the drill which caused a delay on the clearance of students in the building!arghh..

Why are thomasians so apathetic?!! Hasn’t it crossed their minds that an accident may occur anytime and that drill was for our own safety?! Its just a matter of that petty attitude called cooperation guys, was that hard to do?! Or was it too much to ask from all of us?!

Arghh.. that was really annoying.. change topic please!

Sir Olivar never showed up, vet said he texted her and told her that he won’t be able to come but the report should still continue! What!!! How does he expect us to lbe attentive to the reporters?! When we’re having a hard time doing so when he’s around, what more if he isn’t?! right!hmmpp.. whatever!!

I was able to bump into ate madel while walking with dez at the corridor, she’s about to wait for him at another class cause she’s to take her final exams. She told us that he wasn’t able to come because he was suffering from “stomach flu”

What the hell was that??!?!?!? Was that a medical euphemism or a grave ‘illness’. Hahahahaha! It made me think.. hmmm I think I better ask him to suffice my curious mind!hihihihi! J

Whatever it is,, that won’t be able to cover up the fact that he never showed up,, he wanted the report be continued without his presence and.. and.. uhmm.. okay nevermind! Its still annoying!grrr…

**1st day of speech finals..
I was pretty satisfied with how our finals at speech begun, my classmates were all prepared,. And gladly they all performed well together with their partners in their respective dialogues and/or monologues.

Congratulations guys!:)

**Exc’z

_*I guessed at some items in our pe finals..hahaha! I have a choice don’t know the symbols on the score sheet,, cause I never experienced to be an umpire or a referee!hihihi!.. but luckily I got 88 on the exam and some answers are correct.. and more luckily I got a garnered a grade of 1.25 for my softball class!wohoo!!!:)

_*dez has an imaginary friend, which she gave an interesting and unique name.. DODONG!wahahahaha! we’re laughing at her while we’re on the train cause she keeps on pretending to be talking to that ‘imaginary friend’ of hers! I think the sadness due to the end of our PE classes seeped into her head!Hihihihi! just kidding!

_*after the PE we sat down at AB pav cause madie and dez started reading their scripts for their dialogues.. hmm.. I wonder why I wasn’t even reading mine??!haha! cause I just don’t’ feel like!

_*Can you believe it? I was able to invent a word.. and it is.. WORMANOID! It is an adjective used to describe a person who frequently opposes your thoughts and notions for petty reason or sometimes for no reason at all. Am I just great or what?!?wahahahaha!

*forcing a smile mode*