presumption of the unexpected (when UP called)

yesterday jenny called me up to tell me that the journalism department of UP already called her up to update her that she would take the essay exam on may 16. she keeps on insisting that I would also receive the same call.. because its like next to im,possible that she passed and that I woudn’t when my average is higher than her’s... and that it would be unfair on her part that she’s the only who gets to experience the chills and mixed emotions upon receiving that call..

I was really not expecting any call because I have my personal reasons why..
1.is that I dont want to transfer any more..
2.i dont wanna leave my friends..
3.my accomplishment as a dean’s lister would be of no importance anymore..
4.mine’s studying at FEU (we could see each other often if I won’t transfer..)
5.I love UST
6. Im accustomed with the thomasian life..
7.I dont wanna experience culture shock..
8.I dont wanna compose a research paper AGAIN..!!
9.I dont want to start all over again..
10.I think that im born to be a thomasian.. and nothing else!!

But then I think jenny’s just a too good wisher.. cause just a while ago.. about 10.45 in the morning.. our phone rang.. and there it is! The call.. an employee from the UP registrar called me up.. to notify me that I would also be taking the essay exam on may 16.. 9:00 a.m. at the journalism building!**OH MY GOD!!!** i really never expected the call.. momy was right.. it was all mixed emotions when i put down the phone!

Im happy that they called me up.. because I was able to prove something to myself.. that somehow I passed the evaluation.. but then im a bit aggravated that they still called me coz i dont wanna transfer any more..! i dont wanna keep my parent’s hope up.. but.. if only.. i could.. tell them.. that... aaahh!! Whatever its nonsense.. im kinda scared to tell them about the news coz my mom told me last week that when I get to pass there in UP.. i would transfer..for sure! The tone of her voice was assuring.. as if nothing could ever cahnge it..! there can only be one way for me not to transfer.. and that is.. to fail tha essay exam and the interview...INTENTIONALLY!!! its kinda meanbut.. whatever! Im kinda anxious about what’s onna happen to me this Friday on my interview at the AIT.. for TOURISM... hmm... i dont know.. its surely a mixed emotion momy....

*uneasy mode*